Wednesday, October 19, 2011

The Dreamer Within

There have been countless times where I've been hurt. Hurt by people, by the world, by history, by myself. I learned a long time ago that I have this dreamer within. A foolish idealist who'll continue to struggle with the harsh realities of this existence. At first, I hated it. I hated him. He sat inside of me, lost in delusional fantasies. He distracted me from dealing with the slaps and punches life threw at me. It felt as if I had to exorcise him, him and his glazed eyes, his ever optimistic spirit. It pervaded my core, my mind, my heart, surrounding me with an aura of hope. Hope that caused pain. And yet, as much as I despised him, as much as I fought to remove him, he would always win. He would always put a smile on my face. His thirst for life, as Idealistic as he saw it, drove inspiration through me. The muscles in my neck resisted, but they would always succumb, and then they would slowly lift my head up, drawing my eyes to the horizon. A horizon that was ambiguous and mysterious. The dreamer within loved that. He loved the fathomless unknown that the future was. For him, not knowing the future gave him a sense of adventure and of hope. All the things life teased me with and then took away, the dreamer within knew, that at the horizon, there the things lay. Until now, he lays within me, but now I am at harmony with him. I've realized, he isn't an intruder. He's not a parasite or an alien. He is me. I am that dreamer within. And woah does the future look bright!


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